Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
