Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
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What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
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WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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