i don't plan on having that self control this summer
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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