Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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