i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
