We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....