It's Friday. Sex?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.