hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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