Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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