HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Is that strawberry winking at me??
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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