I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
He felt like a one man threesome
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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