it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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