That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
