I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
It's rum buckets o'clock
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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