I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
