Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
