either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
