lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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