You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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