I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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