So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I have so many feelings about this burrito
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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