2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
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