he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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