the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
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