She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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