Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
even my farts smell like vagina
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize