The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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