I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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