clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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