3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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