so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
