I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
