Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
