How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
