I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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