But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Randomize