Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
