You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
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It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap