if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
