It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
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Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
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Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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