apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
