Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
It's blow job season.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
