That's intense
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize