Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.