Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
