For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
