we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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