He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
