"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
