How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
