don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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